Cupcakes & Tea with Elizabeth

Tag: identity

  • Book Review: We’re Going to Need More Wine by Gabrielle Union

    Book Review: We’re Going to Need More Wine by Gabrielle Union

    Book Review: We’re Going to Need More Wine by Gabrielle Union

    When my cousin handed me We’re Going to Need More Wine by Gabrielle Union, she said, “Elizabeth! I was listening to her in an interview, and I thought — THAT’S ELIZABETH!” And honestly, I’ll take that compliment any day. Because, let’s be real — Gabrielle Union is amazing.

    I don’t usually reach for celebrity memoirs, but I’m so glad I gave this one a chance. Gabrielle’s voice is raw, funny, and refreshingly honest. She dives into everything — from navigating Hollywood and love to confronting the pain of sexual assault and unpacking her experience with Blackness and identity. Her stories are layered, deeply human, and often hit closer to home than expected.

    There was one passage that stopped me in my tracks. Gabrielle describes how, after her assault, she began timing every part of her life — how long she’d stay somewhere, when she’d leave, even how she’d move through public spaces — to minimize the chance that something bad could happen.

    “Timing became the most important thing in my life. I timed everything I did to try to reduce the space for something else to happen to me… That’s how my brain began to function.” — Page 101

    I remember rereading that paragraph over and over again. It was like someone finally put words to something I had silently lived for years. I even ran to my boyfriend’s game room mid-read, yelling, “She gets it! She understands!” Then called my friend Maggie just to say the same thing.

    For the first time, I felt seen. I didn’t have to explain the hyper-awareness, the constant mental clock, the exhaustion of just being. Gabrielle had already done it — and done it with grace, humor, and courage.

    Her essays reminded me how healing it is to read someone else’s truth — especially when it mirrors your own. She doesn’t shy away from difficult conversations about race, colorism, trauma, and womanhood. Yet somehow, she balances it all with wit and heart.

    We’re Going to Need More Wine isn’t just a memoir — it’s a conversation between friends. It’s the kind of book you sip through slowly, dog-ear, highlight, and carry with you long after the last page. Whether you’re a memoir lover or just looking for something honest, funny, and healing — this one’s a must-read.

    📚 Cupcakes & Tea with Elizabeth Rating: ★★★★★

    Raw. Relatable. Absolutely unforgettable.

  • The Stories That Built Me

    The Stories That Built Me

    “I have great respect for the past. If you don’t know where you’ve come from, you don’t know where you’re going.”
    — Maya Angelou

    Every family has stories that shape who they are, and around Christmas a few years ago, I got to hear some of mine. My parents sat me down and shared pieces of our family history that left me in awe — stories of strength, courage, and quiet resilience that built the foundation I stand on today.

    One of those stories was about my great-grandmother’s sister, who worked down South as a schoolteacher. She was light-skinned and could pass as white — something that came with complicated privileges during that time. Across from the school was a hat shop that allowed white customers to try on hats before buying them. Black customers, however, had to purchase any hat they touched. My great-grandmother’s sister would walk into that shop and try on as many hats as she pleased, knowing she could get away with it. It was a small, almost defiant act — one that spoke volumes about navigating an unjust world with quiet boldness.

    Then there was my grandmother’s father — my great-great-grandfather. He was also light-skinned, with light eyes, and worked as a painter at a hotel. One day, he walked in with the Black maids, and his boss pulled him aside.
    “Why did you walk in with the colored women?” the boss asked.
    My great-great-grandfather simply replied, “Well, they play cards with my wife.”
    The manager, shocked, said, “Your wife? You mean to tell me you’re colored!?”
    “Yes, sir,” he said calmly.
    The boss looked around and whispered, “Look, I like you. You’re good at your job. But don’t tell anyone you’re colored, or we’ll have to fire you.”

    Hearing these stories, I felt an ache — pride mixed with sadness. These were people who carried themselves with grace and strength in the face of injustice. People who worked hard, protected their families, and found ways to keep their dignity intact in a world that didn’t always see it.

    Some might say, “The past is the past — why bring it up?” But I think remembering is an act of love. It’s how we honor the struggle, the perseverance, and the humanity that got us here. Forgetting would mean erasing the very roots that keep us grounded.

    If I could talk to them today, I’d tell them how proud I am — proud of the resilience that runs through our blood, proud of the lessons they left behind, proud to carry their spirit forward.

    Resilience. That’s what created me.

    “You may tell a tale that takes up residence in someone’s soul, becomes their blood and self and purpose… That is your role, your gift.”
    — Erin Morgenstern